Kitty from Rockport, TX, asked:
Hi Julie,
Ivan is an 87-year-old man who lives alone and for whom I have been cleaning for the past 7 years.
He has become my unofficially adopted grandfather and has no family except for a granddaughter in Michigan. They don’t seem to have a relationship. My daughter, her dad and I are all Ivan has.
Ivan was diagnosed with lung cancer about 6-7 months ago but has refused medical treatment. He claims he’s ready to go but I’m not so sure that’s true because he’s made comments about being afraid to go.
I just feel he doesn’t want the trouble of all the doctor’s appointments and medication side effects. Who really would, right (!?), especially at 87 years old.
Since his diagnosis, Ivan has become quite confused. He forgets dates, to pay his bills, and conversations we’ve just had. In addition, he’s not bathing or eating much anymore.
I would just like to know which stage of death he is in. He is very demanding and it’s exhausting us all but still we take care of him.
It’s apparent he doesn’t need to be living alone but he has told me that his wishes are to die in his home. I have not called Adult Protective Services because I don’t want to interfere with what he wants.
What should I do? Should I call or let fate work it out?
Currently on chapter 6 of your Angelic Attendants book and it’s so helpful. Thanks Julie.
Sincerely,
Kitty
Hi Kitty,
You are what I call an “earth angel” for your devotion and care of Ivan. Bless you!
He is currently in Phase 9 of the Twelve Phases of Transition®.
That means his spirit is out of his body and is attached to the top of his head in a bubble configuration. He is surrounded by angels and the spirits of deceased loved ones and pets.
Ivan tells me he is ready to go, isn’t in much pain, and just needs “to get on with it”.
My advice is to call in a Hospice agency for assistance.
Ivan’s Medicare insurance should cover the cost and the hospice staff can help with bathing, end-of-life care, and allowing him to pass in his home.
Sending big hugs ~
Julie