Peggy from Palm Beach, FL, asked:
Hi Julie,
Thank you for helping people around the world. You’re so kind to everyone and provide a lot of comfort to those who seem to need it most. Hope I too can benefit from some of your positive energy.
My issue seems to be centered around blame. It’s as if I get blamed for all the things that are wrong in my world.
My family blames me for my father’s death. Since I was the one who lived in the same town as my dad, my siblings think I should’ve known he was sick and insisted he see a doctor. I did, both, and he chose not to go.
My co-workers blame me whenever anything goes wrong in our department, even things for which I’m not responsible.
And finally, my husband blames me when things break around our home. As if I’m somehow purposely making appliances malfunction.
It’s exhausting.
What can I do to stop being the focus of this blame game?
Love and light,
Peggy
Hi Peggy,
Thanks for your kind comments and for submitting such an interesting question.
With all of the pandemic and social unrest issues our world is experiencing, blame does seem to be a current mantra for just about everything.
First and foremost, it’s important to remember we can’t affect anyone else’s reality because we can’t control what they think. Likewise, no one can affect our reality for the same reason, they can’t control what we think.
People initially blame others for problems in their lives because it makes them feel better. Blame allows people to avoid taking responsibility for their negative circumstances.
When blame is involved, nobody benefits. It’s detrimental to the blamer who can eventually feel hopeless to change their circumstances as well as to the victim who feels persecuted.
Focus on your thoughts, what feels good to you. Do your best to avoid a reaction when someone blames you for something you didn’t do.
Look at the situation from a different perspective. Perhaps the person doing the blaming is having some difficulties you’re unaware of. Perhaps they’re jealous of you and your life. Perhaps they choose to make you the center of unwanted attention because they’re insecure and don’t want anyone to notice them.
When you come from a compassionate place, everyone benefits, even you!
