fbpx

Julie Ryan

Facebook-f Instagram Twitter Youtube
Menu
Menu

Grief

Navigating Dreams of Grief

/

Melissa from Ogden, UT, asked:

Hi Julie,

Almost a year ago, my husband lost a lifelong friend to suicide.

This morning, he woke up disoriented, describing an overwhelming experience of vivid memories flooding his mind throughout the night. It’s as if he relived their entire 45 years of friendship in a continuous reel.

He’s shocked by this, and I’m worried about what it might mean.

Do you have any insight or advice?

Thank you,

Melissa

Hi Melissa,

I’m sorry to hear about your husband’s loss and the disconcerting experience he had last night.

It sounds like he may have experienced a phenomenon known as “dream replay” or “memory consolidation” where the brain processes and replays memories during sleep. Given the intensity and vividness of the memories, coupled with the recent anniversary of his friend’s passing, it’s understandable that this would be a powerful and overwhelming experience for him.

In addition, dreams can take us to unfamiliar realms and realities, sometimes beyond our human understanding. While dream messages may be positive, their interpretation can be unsettling when filtered through our human experiences. Considering your husband’s thoughts of his friend on the anniversary of his passing, I believe his dream offered closure and played a role in his grieving journey.

 

Navigating Dreams of Grief Read More »

How to Reconnect with Deceased Loved Ones

4 Comments / /

Lora from Coos Bay, OR, asked;

Hi Julie,

I lost my soul mom in 2019 and my soulmate in 2022.

I’ve had spiritual gifts off and on throughout my life and feel in order to heal, I need to find a way to reconnect with spirit and every other member of my soul tribe. I feel lost without them.

Any suggestions from them and you would be most helpful and welcomed.

Thanks.

Lora

Hi Lora,

That’s a lot of loss in a short period of time. My condolences.

The first step in spirit communication is to understand our heads are like big satellite dishes that transmit and receive frequencies and every spirit has a frequency they keep throughout all of their lifetimes.

So, the best way to connect with your deceased loved ones is to just think of them. That’ll tune your satellite dish head to their frequency. It’s like choosing a radio channel.

Then, say something either silently or aloud to them. Your loved one will answer you within a second or before and it’ll seem like a thought in your head. How you’ll know it’s from them is to pay attention to that first thought.

Spirits communicate in words, phrases, images, and symbols, so be open to your interpretation of the thoughts you receive.

For example, if you ask your mom for a sign she’s near, the answer you may receive is a yellow rose.

Be open to how and where you see a yellow rose. It could be in a garden, magazine, grocery store flower department, on a piece of jewelry someone wears, etc.

The applicability of a message from a loved one will always be predicated on how we ask a question so be specific.

To really sharpen your telepathic skills, enroll in one of my trainings. They both come with practice groups that let you continue to develop and enhance your abilities over time.

My Angels and Enlightenment Training is self-paced and online and my Angelic Attendant Training (AAT) is in-person over a weekend. The next AAT is in Atlanta, GA, November 3-5th. Come join us!

How to Reconnect with Deceased Loved Ones Read More »

Coins From Heaven

5 Comments / /

Teresa from Lake Havasu, AZ, asked:

Hello Julie,

I have been experiencing finding coins almost every day, sometimes more than ten times a day.

At this point, it happens so frequently, I just expect the coins to show up.

The coins can be pennies, nickels, dimes, or quarters, and show the year my loved ones’ or my husband’s loved ones’ died.

I call out and ask what they’re trying to tell us. Please tell me what you think. 

Thanks,

Teresa

Hi Teresa,

Your loved ones are letting you know several things:

– They’re always around you.

– The death year shown is to celebrate their “Heavenly” birthdays, i.e., when they transitioned.

– You are attracting abundance.

Furthermore, in many cultures, coins have historically been a part of burial practices.

In Greek mythology, coins were needed to get to the afterlife so in ancient Greece, coins would be placed in the mouth or eyes of the deceased and provide money for their journey.

In Cambodia, a silver or gold coin was placed in the mouth of the deceased before cremation. This was considered the only wealth the dead could take to the afterlife. 

Another burial tradition in many cultures is the practice of putting coins on graves. When visiting Veteran cemeteries in the United States, you may see coins on headstones.

There is a meaning associated with each coin. A penny means someone has visited the grave. A nickel signifies the visitor served with the deceased service member at boot camp. A dime means the visitor and deceased service member served together at some point and a quarter is left by someone who was physically with the service member when he or she died.

Coins are left on graves in other cultures too. Throughout Latin America, people leave coins on the graves of their loved ones. This happens predominantly in areas where wealth isn’t plentiful. Leaving a few coins on a grave is a way to show respect without having to find the money for a bouquet of flowers. 

I hope you continue to enjoy these amazing signs from your deceased loved ones.

Coins From Heaven Read More »

Bereaved Daughter Seeks Answers

2 Comments / /

Hellen from Kampala, Uganda, asked:

Hi Julie,

I just recently learned about you and wish I had known about you sooner.

My dad recently passed in late December from prostate cancer. He was 74 years old and my mom passed away in 2000. My father’s death is very devastating for me and my family because he was our only surviving parent.

When my dad was diagnosed in August of 2018, my sister and I immediately embarked on a mission to help him survive. This included medical intervention and prayer.

I feel let down by God for not healing my dad or for at least allowing him to live a somehow normal life with the cancer.

We weren’t there at the time my dad passed because our goal was for him to get better and leave the hospital alive.

Can you please share any information about his transition, any message from him or my mother, and why God didn’t answer our prayers about giving him a second chance so we could have him a little longer.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Thank you for all the work you do.

Kind regards,

Hellen

Hi Hellen,

My sincere condolences to you and your family on the loss of your father.

It sounds like you and your sister went out of your way to assist him in a multitude of ways both physical and spiritual at the end of his life.

Feeling let down or even angry with God is understandable and is part of the grieving process.

The University of Washington Counseling Center says the five stages of grief are, “Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance, and that these stages are our attempts to process change and protect ourselves while we adapt to a new reality.”

There isn’t anything you or anyone else could’ve done to prolong your dad’s life. It has been my experience (in working with thousands of families as their loved one is at the end of their lives) that we all decide when, where, how, and with whom we transition. Although it doesn’t make sense to most of us left behind, it is always a person’s spirit’s prerogative to make these choices. 

Just ask any funeral director, pastor, or medical provider who has worked with dying people. They’ll have countless stories about how the person waited for someone to arrive, waited until everyone left the room, or waited for a final request to be granted.

Regarding your dad’s transition, no one ever dies alone, including your dad. He was surrounded by angels, the spirits of deceased loved ones and pets and of course your mom’s spirit was there too. Please check out my Angelic Attendants: What Really Happens As We Transition From This Life Into The Next book for more details.

As for messages from your parents, your mother’s spirit is showing me herself smiling and holding a bunch of brightly colored balloons. She went on to say, all life, whether in physical or spirit is like a party!

Your dad is showing me him sitting in a chair in the countryside watching herds of wild animals like zebras and wildebeests run by. He told me he loves doing that because since he’s now a spirit, the animals can’t see him. He sounds like he was a fun guy.

Hope this information comforts you.

Bereaved Daughter Seeks Answers Read More »

Spiritual Growth

/

Diana from Sydney, Australia, asked:

Hi Julie,

My amazing father left us earth side in February 2020. I miss him every day and feel both pain and love in my heart every time I think about him.

It was in his passing that I also started my incredible spiritual journey and learned to love myself again and experience true joy and happiness.

As the Selena Gomez song goes, “I needed to lose you (dad) to love me”, and, I can’t help but feel guilty at times for thinking this way. How can I possibly be happy when my dad is no longer here with us in physical form? 

So, my question for my dad is, why did it take your death for me to be happy? And, how is life in Heaven? I love you dad!

Thanks,

Diana

Hi Diana,

I’m sorry for your loss with your dad’s passing and I’m thrilled it seemed to be the catalyst for what sounds like an amazing spiritual journey.

It’s completely natural to feel the gamut of emotions you describe ranging from sorrow to elation. We all process grief differently and how it shows up is perfect for us as individuals.

Regarding your questions about how you can feel good when your father’s gone and why it took your dad’s death for you to experience happiness, my answer focuses on vibration.

We’re all eternal spirits (energy) attached to a body having a human experience. When our life is over, our human bodies die and the everlasting part of us, (our spirit), continues.

In each lifetime, we explore experiences that raise our vibrational level. This allows us to understand concepts that heretofore may not have made sense to us.

When your dad passed, what you experienced, raised your vibrational level. And since his death, you’ve continued to raise your vibrational level, access and comprehend more complex concepts that allow you to be in alignment with your spirit, attract divine guidance, and live a more abundant, joyful, life.

It’s like diving into the deep end of a pool. If you can’t swim, you probably won’t think of being in deep water because it’s too scary. So, you go into the shallow water, wade to your waist, then to your shoulders, learn how to tread water, and eventually swim. Then, equipped with these skills, you resonate with the idea of diving into deep water and easily do it.

At this point, your spirit has expanded enough to access this new concept of easily living a joyful life regardless of what’s happening around you. Everything is unfolding perfectly. Trust that and continue to follow where you’re led. If it feels good, take action. If not, investigate and find out if your hesitation is based in a real or fake fear.

Hope this helps clarify things for you.

P.S. – Your dad said to let you know life in Heaven is amazing and he loves you back!

Spiritual Growth Read More »

Educate and Comfort

/

Shari from Columbus, OH, asked:

Hi Julie,

I read your book Angelic Attendants and it is excellent!

I was by my mother’s side when she transitioned 21 years ago and it was actually a beautiful experience.

I sense her around me all the time and her spirit even showed up in a picture taken of me and my family four years after she passed away! I will treasure this picture forever.

For years, I’ve been wanting to reach out to other people to comfort them after their loved one has passed and let them know their spirit can still be present with them even when they are no longer in the physical world. Alas, I have no idea how to do this.

Any suggestions?

Thank you for taking time to read and answer my question.

Sincerely,

Shari

Hi Shari,

Thanks for your kind comments and for reading Angelic Attendants.

Love the story about your mom’s spirit showing up in your family photo several years after she passed. What a great example of your mother letting you know she’s around you.

Regarding your desire to help comfort and educate those who’ve lost a loved one, I have several suggestions:

– Volunteer with a hospice organization.

– Get involved in grief support groups at local churches, hospitals, senior centers, and online.

– Gift a book on the topic. Two favorites are my Angelic Attendants: What Really Happens As We Transition From This Life Into The Next and Death Is But A Dream by Christopher Kerr, MD, PhD.

– Send people a link to my interview with Dr. Chris Kerr. It’s enlightening, heartwarming, and validates how spirits surround end-of-life patients.

– Consider taking my Angelic Attendant Training and learn to telepathically communicate with the dying person and tell how close to passing they are by identifying the Twelve Phases of Transition®. The information you’ll receive can be enormously helpful and comforting to the family.

Hope you find these ideas thought-provoking.

Educate and Comfort Read More »

Wait For Love

/

Bertha in Central Islip, NY, asked:

Hi Julie,

I love your podcast so much and although this question is silly, I just need some relief.

My boyfriend and I broke up this week and I’m heartbroken.

It wasn’t because of something bad, just that his job got very demanding. This caused him to be tired and stressed. He is also going to take classes and temporarily move away (from Long Island to Brooklyn). Since he can’t make us a priority, he feels it’s best for us to go our own ways.

He mentioned we can find each other in a few years when his job is more stable and he moves back to Long Island.

My question is, should I even entertain the idea of us getting back together?

Thank you for your input and for your show!

Bertha

Hi Bertha,

So sorry to hear you’re hurting after the breakup with your boyfriend. That’s something most of us go through multiple times in our lives and it’s never easy.

As for whether you should wait around for him with the hope his job becomes less demanding, he has more free time, and he moves back to Long Island, here are a few thoughts for you to ponder.

The old saying, “If you love something set it free. If it comes back it’s yours. If not, it was never meant to be,” applies in your situation.

Psychology Today says, “What is behind this old saying? Some interpret it as a description of fate. Only fate can determine whether a relationship was meant to be. So, if you let someone go, they will come back if that’s your destiny.

For those of us who don’t believe in determinism, this explanation does not ring true. A better interpretation is that you cannot force someone to love you. You have to give them the freedom to choose.” I tend to agree with the shrinks.

As you may know, I’m a volunteer sorority advisor at the University of Alabama and have had countless chats with girls in your position who’ve recently broken up with their boyfriend.

My advice to them is the same I’m giving you. Just remember one four-letter word … NEXT! Who’s next?

Get on with your life and if you and your former boyfriend’s paths cross, see how you feel then. It’s common for people’s lives to unfold in ways that make what was once a match, not make sense anymore.

Lastly, when I asked Spirit’s guidance about whether it was in your best interest to wait for your former boyfriend, the answer i “got” was NO!

 

 

Wait For Love Read More »

Advice From Spirit

/

Stefanie from Slidell, LA, asked:

Hi Julie,

I wanted to seek advice from my friend who recently transitioned from Covid-19 in February 2021. She’s the only one that knows me like the back of my hand.

She knows my relationship with the father of my children and I need to know her advice on moving on without him as a spouse and just as a father to my children.  

Any advice she gives will be amazing.

I miss her so much and I just know she can hear me.

Thanks for your help with this.

Stefanie

Hi Stefanie,

My condolences on the loss of your friend.

To get some information for you, I first connected with you and from you to your late friend.

She said, “You’re a rock!” She also said, “You’ve been through so much this year and it’s only September. Stay strong!”

Your friend wanted you to know she’s always around you and is supporting you from Heaven.

Now, with regards to your relationship, she suggests you move on with your life and find happiness with someone who loves you and your kids.

In addition, I asked God, the universe, your spirit guides, angels, and deceased loved ones the same question. They unanimously concurred.

Remember, you can chat with your late friend’s spirit and any other spirit any time you wish.

Just say something to them either in your head or aloud and your next thought will be their answer. It’ll feel like a thought in your head.

How you’ll know it’s them is, it’ll be the first thought you have and it’ll arrive within a second (sometimes even before your thought is finished).

If you think about the answer for more than a second, that’ll be your brain talking to you.

Hope this information helps.

Advice From Spirit Read More »

Surviving Grief

/

They say deaths come in threes and this week it proved to be true.

On Monday, a high school friend passed away from cancer. Sharon was a fun, kind, beautiful gal who brightened every room she entered.

On Tuesday, our son Jonathan’s fiancé Mallory’s grandfather died after deciding to discontinue kidney dialysis. Clarence, (known to his family as Opa), was a decorated veteran, a former army ranger, who was always the life of the party wherever he went. Everyone enjoyed hearing his jokes and stories and simply loved being around him.

On Wednesday, our neighbor Ed committed suicide. He was a successful attorney with a beautiful wife, family, home and what seemed to be a charmed life. The shock of his untimely death has his family and friends reeling as they try to make sense of the whole situation.

Eventually we’ll all face the loss of a loved one and will know people who experience the same. So how do we survive the grief that inevitably affects each and every one of us?

Here are some strategies I employ that may help you when you find yourself in this place.

First, remember, we all decide when, where, how and who’s with us when we go. Knowing this helps ease the guilt some of us feel when we’re not there at the exact moment our loved one dies.

Second, remember, we’re all surrounded by angels and deceased loved ones as we’re dying, all of whom escort us, all of us, to Heaven. It doesn’t matter if the dying process happens instantly or over days, week or months, everyone goes through the Twelve Phases of Transition and it’s a glorious scene.

Third, remember, grief comes in waves. Just like waves of the ocean, grief has three phases … calm, disruption, repair. The sea is calm, then a wave comes crashing into the shore with a lot of force and then recedes. Grief is the same. The feeling overcomes us, recedes and then goes away. When the pain is intense, allow it to pass through you and you’ll notice how it eventually lessens.

Lastly, I do my best to find little miracles along the way. Sharon lived long enough to see a grandbaby born and christened. Clarence waited for his daughter to arrive from Arizona. He passed two hours after she landed. And Ed laid his will, wallet, cell phone, and a large amount of cash on his bed and placed a file of household bills on his desk. In addition, he opened cabinet doors in his home office to expose binders with investment portfolio information. He made efforts to give his wife some direction in order to help lessen her burden.

When my little sister Joan died of a cerebral aneurysm in 2010, my dear friend Debra told me, “Life is for the living”, and that simple phrase has stuck with me ever since. Focus on a life well lived, prepare food and take it to the family, send a comforting note or book like Angelic Attendants, and mostly, just be present and allow yourself and others whatever time it takes to grieve.

Surviving Grief Read More »